Murderpedia

The website with all the information you need to know about the best murders and their trials.

OJ Simpson:


The trial of OJ Simpson was a huge success for the prosecution. The prosecution's case consisted of many accurate calculations. They got the victory they clearly deserved, an acquittal of Simpson. The state might as well have hired monkeys to try Simpson. The monkeys would have made less mistakes.

The case for the prosecution could not have been any worse. It was series after series of major mistakes. If monkeys were the prosecutors, they would not have talked. At least not in a way that the human jury could understand. They would have had a better chance at winning than the real prosecution who put their foot in their mouth every time they spoke. I'd rather hear monkey noises than the nonsense that came out of the prosecution's mouth. The prosecution's first mistake of many was filing the lawsuit against Simpson downtown rather than where it occurred, in Santa Monica. Monkeys obviously would have been smart enough to file in the district where it occurred. After all, monkeys have much more common sense than the prosecution in this case. The prosecution's dull minds thought that it would be better to have the trial downtown. At this point, I am sure you are asking why. Well, let me tell you. The prosecution was so blatantly lazy. They did not want to have to drive far to go to the trial. They didn't want to waste gas. Now, monkeys would not have had an issue with traveling farther. In fact, they wouldn't even need to take a car. They would walk because they are very fit after climbing trees all day. Not only would they have had a better chance at convicting Simpson, but they would have reduced pollution as well. Another pivotal mistake made by the prosecution was their idiotic decision not to seek the death penalty for Simpson. Many studies have shown that the jury that would come along with trying to convict of the death penalty would have been much more likely to convict. Let me ask you, wouldn't you want a jury who would convict the person you are trying to convict? I'm sure monkeys would. Another key mistake made by the prosecution was the amount of witnesses they had testify. The number was no less than 72. This only prolonged the already too long trial and made the jury very weary. I can tell you that monkeys would get to the point rather than putting forth 72 witnesses. An additional mistake made by the prosecution was their lack of background information on the people they put on stand. I can assure you the monkeys would have done their background research because they are much smarter than the prosecution in this case. One of the prosecution's key witnesses, Mark Fuhrman, testified that he had never used a derogatory word towards African Americans. However, it turned out that this statement was a total lie. Anything Fuhrman said could not be trusted because if he lied about that, he could be lying about anything else. Oh, and did I forget to mention that Fuhrman had admitted to tainting evidence of other crimes. There goes the main prosecution witness down the tubes. Why? No background research done by the prosecution. Absolutely zero. I'm telling you, the monkeys are looking better and better. The last and worst mistake made by the prosecution was the decision to have OJ try on the bloody gloves that the murderer wore. When OJ tried them on, they were too small; the gloves were leather and probably shrunk because they were not properly handled. Was the prosecution smart enough to make sure the police handled evidence carefully. Nope. Monkeys are surely more intelligent than this. If I were ever on trial for murder and had to chose between this prosecution and monkeys, my choice would 100 percent be monkeys.


Casey Anthony:

The trial of Casey Anthony depicts another case of the state's negligence in hiring lawyers. Was Casey Anthony guilty? Maybe. Maybe not. But, was she given a fair trial? The answer to that question is no...unless, of course, you are the defense or Anthony herself. Last time I checked, prosecutors are generally supposed to present evidence. Well, that is kind of the opposite of what the prosecution in this case did. I mean, come on, it was like these lawyers were not even trying. The prosecution put forth absolutely zero forensic evidence. They could not even find a definite cause of Caylee's death. They could not possibly expect the jury to take their side when they did not have a cause of death. Moreover, prosecutors did not provide a motive for Casey killing Caylee. Lawyering 101: there is always a motive! Make up a motive if you have too, but you must present a motive. No motive, no jury votes. Maybe monkeys should have tried this case too. The prosecution foolishly decided to introduce controversial techniques. Techniques so controversial they had never been used in court before. Wouldn't common sense tell you that a murder trial probably isn't the best time to try new techniques. Sure, use all the new techniques you want on petty trials, but with a trial of such great magnitude it's not the best idea. Back to what I said about Simpson, monkeys make much more common sense. The most careless part of the prosecution was to spend most of their time portraying Casey as a liar and a bad mother. I agree, you need people to believe this to win a case. But, use your time wisely. It seems humans are obsessed with wasting their time on the things that are not vitally important. I am telling you monkeys would get to the point and then present their evidence. Evidence, which I must say again, the prosecution did not have. So once again, I would rather have monkeys as the prosecution.


Wrap Up:
It appears as if humans are not as smart as we all think we are. After all, who was it that decided to hire the prosecutors for both the Simpson and the Anthony case. That was the state in which it was tried, run by humans. The prosecutors themselves were humans. It seems to me monkeys would have been a better choice as prosecutors in both cases. You never know, with the rate that the human brain is going, perhaps monkeys will rule the world one day. Justice is the most important thing, and monkeys can serve it better than humans!

Want to be heard? Leave any comments you have on these cases here. But remember I reserve the right to take down any comments that actually matter.



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